Sunday, October 7, 2012

THE TRUTH BEHIND OBAMA'S DEBATE DEBACLE

A Presidental Imposture?
Channel 1 News in an exclusive interview with President Obama's debate coach, learned what was behind the president's poor performance in Wednesday night's debate. Democrats and pundits alike were reeling over the debating skills of the President, who has held his own in the past.  The debate coach granted the interview in return for a promise of anonymity, saying she would lose her job if her identity was revealed.  Channel 1 News never gives out such information and promised Ms. Lokjaw the anonymity she requested.

Irok Umoma and Itsa
 Longshot appear as the
President and First Lady
Channel 1 News learned the following;  Once it was announced the first debate would take place on October 3, the Obamas notified the re-election team that the third of October was their 20th wedding anniversary and they had made plans for a cozy fireside dinner.  A plan was then hatched to bring in the President and first lady's stunt doubles to make the debate appearance in their place.  The two look-a-likes were flown in on the eve of the debate and given a hot meal and an outline of their duties.  The doubles are Irok Umoma and Itsa Longshot, both off Broadway actors who normally drink free when they go out because of their similar looks to Barack and Michele. "I can't walk into a bar," said a smiling Irok.  "Without someone buying a drink for the President!" 
A few hours before leaving for Denver, the couple were fitted in evening clothes which they would be able to keep and were able to meet the people they would be filling in for.  "Michele is so nice," Itsa said.  "She is just so down to earth."  Umoma was then given a list of questions that would most likely be asked in the debate and he had promised to go over them prior to meeting Governor Romney on stage. 
It was obvious to anyone watching or listening that Mr. Umoma hadn't done that. He spent almost the entire debate looking downward at what appeared to be a crossword puzzle.  After the debate he was whisked away to an undisclosed location and made to return the suit of clothes he was wearing before being put on a bus home.  Ms. Longshot was allowed to keep her dress but had to find her own way home. 
The debate coach promised us that we would see the real president next time and that he would be ready to put his opponent in his place.  Channel 1 News will be there and bring you the behind the scenes stories you are hungry for.  Dave Taylor's motto is, "If your hungry for news, I'm full of it!"
Channel 1 News is out to prove it.

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