Monday, December 17, 2012

MAYOR DECLARES END OF WORLD PARTY

Mayor Ben Dover gives an
 okay sign to Dave Taylor.
With the end of the world scheduled to come this Friday,  Bridge Port Mayor Ben Dover, showing signs of distress called off his scheduled business trip to Cancun, Mexico.  In a Skype call to Channel 1 News, he appeared shaky at times and amazingly calm at others.  He appeared to take a deep breath before admitting that his doctor had given him something to help him remain numb.  "I'm quite comfortable,"  he told Dave Taylor in their face to face Skype interview.  "I have studied the Mayan calendar and even though it predicts the end, I doubt they could have calculated such an event without the aid of Google or other Internet help."  When asked if he was totally sure, his eyes widened and he bit his lip, "No", he answered before looking off camera towards his physician, Dr. Ooh.
"You don't look very comfortable Mr. Mayor",  Dave Taylor said, " Are you alright?"  Mayor Dover managed a smile and gave Taylor an okay sign with his hand.  "Believe me, I'm comfortably numb.  I also know there is much concern and distress about this prediction of the end of the world and as Mayor I am going to do all that I can to alleviate the fear that many are feeling."  He went on to declare Thursday December 20, 2012 as Thirsty Thursday.  "It will be a day of parties followed by a night of parties I want it to be like 1999 all over again!" he exclaimed with a far away look in his eyes.  In a further attempt to calm the fears held by many, he held up a plane ticket, "Look, this is how sure I am that the world will not end this Friday, I have rescheduled my business trip to Cancun for Monday!"  He ended his interview saying he had another doctors appointment to get to. 
Mayor Ben Dover's personal
physician, Dr. Suzi Ooh holding
his "numbers" as he calls them.
Channel 1 News will be here right up to the end, whenever that is.

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