Tuesday, March 18, 2014

"KISS ME I'M IRISH" SHIRT TO BE BANNED AFTER NEAR FATAL INCIDENT

NOVELTY TEE SHIRT WORN BY PEOPLE OF ALL ETHNICITIES ON ST. PADDY'S DAY NEARLY CAUSES ONE YOUNG MAN HIS LIFE AFTER HE IS MOBBED BY A BUS LOAD OF REVELERS WITH KISSING DISEASE

GREAT FALLS

This is a shirt like the one Squealer wore
yesterday before being chased down and'
almost kissed to death.
Tommy Squealer, 33, of Great Falls, Wisconsin is resting comfortably at home today after surviving a horrific ordeal at a St. Patrick's Day parade yesterday.  Squealer, a Polish/Italian got into the spirit of St. Paddy's day by putting on a "Kiss Me I'm Irish" tee shirt.  He even wore a Leprechaun hat, that was lost in the scuffle that ensued soon after Squealer arrived at the parade route.

Squealer told OFF THE WALL reporter Dave Taylor, that after a few green beers, he even felt Irish.  This feeling soon changed to one of fear when a school bus in the parade stopped in front of where he was standing. OFF THE WALL learned, the rented school bus had been painted green for the parade by the Festers Medical Clinic for Disease and was full of patients out for the holiday. Ironically most of the patients on the bus suffered from various forms of Kissing Disease and after spotting Squealer's shirt in the parade crowd, vacated the bus in a frenzy, running  directly at Squealer.
Kiss victim Tommy Squealer shows the
stitches in his lip after be kissed violently. 
Squealer, who weighs upwards of 270 pounds began running, but was no match for the young and eager pursuers. He was caught and immediately felt himself being kissed repeatedly all about his face and lips. His lips took such a beating, they required and received a dozen stitches.

Police were able to free Squealer and subdue  the patients.  Clinic officials were then able to round up the patients responsible and had them back in the clinic by night fall.
The city of Great Falls issued a ban on the tee shirts and by doing so, hopes to ward off being sued by Squealer.  Squealer's only comment was that he never wanted to be Irish again.  OFF THE WALL will keep tabs and report on any updates to this story.



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