Much to the dismay of many in Congress this new session, Friday the thirteenth once again fell on Friday, causing many of the superstitious congressmen and women to delay plans for beginning an early weekend.
The next Friday the Thirteenth is scheduled in October this year, making it even more chilling because of Halloween.
"This is fixable!" exclaimed a congressional leader hiding in a closet, who was given anonymity in exchange for spilling his guts. "I have written a bill that would make Friday the Thirteenth a federal holiday, sending it to Mondays in the future, securing superstitious free three day weekends for all!"
When questioned about the reasoning of such a bill, he replied with a question, "A well rested congress, can get more done, can't they?" OFF THE WALL news will be following the calendar and alert our readers of any changes.