NEW YORK, NY
According to newly appointed Presidential Advisor, Kellyanne Conway, President Elect Donald Trump is receiving unwarranted personal attacks that are causing him to lose sleep and they should "just stop!"
Conway met numerous members of the press this morning for a news conference before giving OFF THE WALL news an exclusive interview. She met with Dave Taylor in a Trump Tower coffee shop where she sipped coffee between nibbling on a huge frosted long john.
"I like these things", she said with fluttering eyes, "Except they're so sticky." When asked to expand on her earlier remark about Trump's receiving personal attracts, she took a second to remove a small bit of white frosted coating from her cheek. "There better not be any cameras in here!" she said with a grin. When assured she would not be photographed while enjoying her long john, she continued.
"You think Meryl Streep's attack on Mr. Trump Sunday night is the only flack he's getting? That's just the tip of the ice burg! The poor man can't even look in the mirror anymore for fear of seeing someone behind him. I want your readers to know, we have to give Mr. Trump a chance. He deserves a chance to show what he's got."
She took a sip of coffee and wiped another glob of sugar coating from the tip of her nose then opened up her notebook. "I mean, they are giving Kim Jong Un a chance aren't they? And he never had any political experience. North Korea has gone from a agricultural based society to almost becoming a super power, right? How can anyone become great if they are constantly attacked by the likes of Meryl Streep? Let's give Trump a chance to shake things up!"
At that point she dropped the last half of her long john into her lap and the remainder of the interview was called off. OFF THE WALL news will continue to follow the Trump phenomenon into the first 100 days of his presidency.